An Addition to the Family

A pediatrician is an important part of your family's health. Learn to choose the best one.

We are in love. While we didn’t exchange rings or sign any legal documents, it is a committed relationship based on trust, respect and open communication, and we hope it stays rock-solid for years to come. I use the term “in love,” even though the relationship is not romantic in nature. But my husband and I just can’t figure out another way to describe how we feel about our kids’ pediatrician, Dr. Alan.

So what if it sounds silly and overly dramatic. Before, he was a person who was not in our lives in any way. But suddenly, once we became parents, Dr. Alan practically became a member of our family. Seriously, my husband wants to take the guy to a baseball game and buy him a beer.

First-time parents need guidance, help and suggestions in caring for a newborn. From sleeping schedules to the wide world of teething and every sniffle, cough and tummy ache in between, new parents are filled with doubt.

Frankly, advice from family members and friends often comes unsolicited, unfiltered and with a know-it-all attitude. Grandma (and Grandma-In-Law) are probably more than willing to tell you in great detail how it was done in their day and how it should be done in yours. Having a pediatrician’s advice based on medical experience, studies and research is solid gold.

A pediatrician you feel comfortable with and can count on is one of the most comforting feelings for all parents. He or she should be part expert, part guidance counselor and available in times of confusion, desperation or need, even in the middle of the night.

Gossip for Your Kid’s Sake

For my husband and me, finding the pediatrician of our dreams was pretty darn easy. And it can be for you, too. This is a time when chatting up a storm with your girlfriends and being nosy and gossipy is a good thing. Ask friends, co-workers and relatives with kids which pediatrician they use and why. Be sure to ask how nice the office staff is. Big question: How difficult is it to make an appointment or get a return phone call when your kid is sick?

Interviewing Pediatricians List questions in advance, so you can guide the conversation. You’re looking for personality, compassion, someone who shares your values and someone who returns calls about a sick child quickly. Sample questions parents might have for a pediatrician: • What are your office hours and days off? • Who covers for you on your days off? • Is it difficult to get same-day appointments if my child gets sick? • Who returns my call if I have a question? A pediatrician, a nurse or a nurse practitioner? • What are your views on antibiotics, immunizations and child-rearing? • What is your educational and practical background? Take notes on the doctor’s answers. I brought a mini-tape recorder and recorded the whole thing. Poor Dr. Alan! • Do you click with this person? Are you comfortable calling him or her in the middle of the night? • Meet the office staff, if possible.

One of our friends mentioned interviewing prospects. I thought this was brilliant and innovative. Turns out, this is as common at pediatric offices as kids with runny noses. Dr. Stacy Kanagawa of Nixa Pediatrics says expectant parents interview her a couple of times a month. She says the reason is to ensure that you have the best chance of getting a pediatrician with the qualities you’re looking for, one who shares your values and philosophies. Dr. Kanagawa’s key factors to consider: pediatrician personality, availability, compassion, medical accreditation and good support staff.

Dr. Kanagawa suggests taking the top two or three names you get through your grapevine and setting up interviews simply by calling each practice. Easy enough, but be prepared for the interview.

Make a list of questions in advance, both basic and specific to your own concerns or family health history (see sidebar p. 166). Don’t forget what your first-grade teacher said… there is no such thing as a stupid question!

“We try very hard to give anticipatory guidance and to answer some of the most commonly asked questions during a visit,” says Dr. Kanagawa. “However, it is impossible to anticipate every concern that new parents might have. The old saying ‘babies do not come with instruction manuals’ is true, so questions are welcome.”

Both pediatricians my husband and I interviewed were very qualified, smart and matched our search criteria. The tie-breakers seemed trivial. Our comfort with Dr. Alan and his staff won in the end, even though the runners-up had a more convenient location. Hey, we just really liked the guy. He had us at “Hello.”

You don’t have to call the chosen pediatrician’s office to announce that he or she has won your business before your baby is born. While pediatricians welcome that call and are happy to answer any questions before your bundle of joy arrives, you can also just let the hospital know when you deliver your baby.

“We get word from the [hospital] nursery when they are born, but we also have babies assigned to us when they are born if [parents] have not already chosen a pediatrician,” says Dr. Kanagawa.

Remember, the interview process is to help you with one of the most important decisions you can make as new parents. Dr. Alan says it is not a waste of time for the parents-to-be or the doctor.

“I enjoy meeting expectant parents beforehand,” he says. “That way, when I come to see them in the hospital, we already have that connection established. And if it’s a room full of people, I’ll know which ones are the mom and dad!” I love that guy.

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