How to Become a Local Celebrity

Our guide to getting recognized everywhere in Springfield.

Local celebrities: They’re not what you would call famous by Hollywood standards, but you’re going to hear whispers of recognition from people standing behind them in the grocery store line. They’re the people you instantly recognize, both in appearance and in name. Becoming well-known in isn’t easy. But after years of studying every move made by the locals here, we’ve discovered four sure-fire ways to get on the fast track to familiarity.

Rent Billboards on Highway 65

It’s not enough to have your own theatre in Branson. (Heck, there’s one theatre dedicated to water fountains synchronized to piano music.) If you want to make it here, you’re going to need some billboards. And radio commercials. And large feline predators. That’s where marketing consultant Cindy Merry comes in.

Merry is the woman behind some of the most successful marketing campaigns in Branson, including Yakov Smirnoff’s billboards, Jim Stafford’s radio campaigns and Kirby Van Burch’s big cats. Although some of the more famous acts she represents made names for themselves before moving to Branson, it takes hard work to keep those names and faces from falling into pop-culture obscurity.

Secondary suggestion: Brochures help too. See Yakov’s side-by-side brochures that make it look like he’s staring at you from among dozens of pamphlets at the tourist kiosks.

Be On TV For A Long Time

It’s not easy to do anything for more than 40 years, but it helps when you’ve always got a smile on your face. KY3 sportscaster Ned Reynolds, in his 41st year with the station, attributes his success to one thing: He loves what he does. But lots of people love their jobs. That doesn’t make them local celebs. If you ask us, the smile is the key. Reynolds is always smiling, whether the news he’s reporting is good or bad. “Most of the time I like to think of myself as a positive person,” Reynolds says. “But sometimes the subject matter would, in fact, deserve some sort of sardonic reaction.”

Secondary suggestion: Sound like a cartoon character. As Moxie Cinema owner Dan Chilton once joked in an Internet video, Reynolds sounds a lot like Tony the Tiger. “They’re grrrreat!”

Get on a Reality TV show

It’s a given that getting seen on a national TV show will earn you automatic local-celeb status. See these well known examples:

• Before Aaron Buerge opened Trolley’s in downtown Springfield, there was ABC’s The Bachelor.

• Survivor star Heidi Strobel (now Heidi Hamels) took her clothes off on the show, then did it again in Playboy later.

• Branson-based fiddlin’ family The Duttons and lasso master Johnny Lonestar threw their hats into the ring by appearing on NBC’s second season of America’s Got Talent this year. Both made the top 20 for the show, and The Duttons were in the top 10 at press time.

So how do you join the fun? Survivor auditions have been held in 417-land three times in the past two years, most recently this July in Branson. But if you’re going to skip straight from the local to national spotlight, waiting around for a nearby casting call is the wrong approach to take. Get proactive by plastering videos of your hidden talents on YouTube, then cut together a montage of the greatest hits and send it to the studio of your choice.

Secondary suggestion: Marry a pro athlete. Strobel snagged Philadelphia Phillies pitcher Cole Hamels. The two were married on December 31, 2006. (See the current issue of 417 Bride, on newsstands now, for the story.)

Put your name on buildings

Being on TV is a big help in becoming a local celebrity. But so is plastering your name on buildings all over town. To find 417-land’s perfect example of this, just drive down John Q. Hammons Parkway in Springfield, past the JQH Arena construction site to the tall, bronze statue in front of John Q. Hammons tower. No matter where you go in Springfield, you’re probably near at least one building that the developer had a hand in building. Still, he doesn’t consider himself a local celebrity. “I’m not a celebrity in any state of the Union,” Hammons says. “I’m just a guy that works hard, makes a little money and pays the bills.”

Secondary suggestion: Have Nick, Ruell and Ned the Band do a parody song about your real-estate endeavors.