Are there kid-safe fireworks?
For starters, I wouldn’t let kids go wild with bottle rockets—call me old-fashioned, but some things are more dangerous than others. That said, there are several other thrills kids can enjoy while celebrating ’Merica’s birthday:
Cut a Black Snake into fourths, stuff the pieces into your aunt’s pack of Virginia Slims on the sly, and wait for her to light up.
End up with a ton of sparklers at the end of the night? Grab an apple and hang it from a branch. Push the sparklers into the fruit, light ’em up, and you have a spinning display of Fourth of July patriotism.
Teaching children to be safe with fireworks is essential. Showing them what not to do, like throwing poppers at a sleeping grandparent, is crucial.