Bridesmaids Do’s & Don’ts

417-land wedding planners share some valuable insight on potential bridesmaid hazards.

By Becca Huff | Photo courtesy Aaron Clark Photography

Jun 2013



How should a bride handle an unruly bridesmaid or bridesmaids who aren’t getting along? 417-land wedding experts Lenette Kujawa, with Aflair Events, Martha Wright, with Gracious Occasions, Stephanie Weiss of Ella Weiss Wedding Designs, Andrea Alcorn with Gracie's Bridal and Joyce Criswell, with The Bride’s Maid chime in with some words of advice.


DO have your bridesmaid pay for her dress.—Andrea Alcorn of Gracie's Bridal

DON’T worry about having an uneven number in the bridal party. A one- or two-person difference is not a big deal.—Martha Wright of Gracious Occasions

DO tell the bridesmaids upfront what they will have to purchase.—Martha Wright

DON’T feel like you have to have total control over your bridesmaids’ dresses. Some brides choose a color and length and let the bridesmaids choose a dress for their body type.—Joyce Criswell of The Bride's Maid

DO consider the size of the venue when deciding how many bridesmaids to choose. Too many bridesmaids can make the space look cluttered.—Joyce Criswell

DON’T fret about replacing a troublesome bridesmaid. They should support, not stress, the bride.—Lenette Kujawa of Aflair Events

DO come up with creative and thoughtful ways to ask friends to be in your special day. —Stephanie Weiss of Ella Weiss Wedding Designs

DO call upon the bridesmaids to play supportive roles, such as making favors or planning showers or parties. –Lenette Kujawa

DO try to include someone in the bridal party from the fiancé’s family if it’s important to the fiancé. –Martha Wright

DO make the bridesmaids part of the decision when choosing dresses, especially if they are paying for them. –Martha Wright

DO look at different personalities when choosing a bridesmaid to see if they blend together. - Joyce Criswell

DON’T put too much pressure on someone to be your bridesmaid; some can’t afford it or are shy. - Joyce Criswell

DO choose your bridesmaids in advance so they can make travel plans and ask off of work. - Joyce Criswell

DON’T talk about a frustrating bridesmaid behind their back—talk to the bridesmaid about it. - Joyce Criswell

DO be grateful to everyone involved in the wedding and realize it is a celebration for everyone, not just the bride. - Joyce Criswell

DO choose a maid of honor who is focused on the bride’s wishes and who can make good decisions.—Lenette Kujawa

DON'T forget each bridesmaid has their own budget. So don’t forget their circumstances, because being a bridesmaid can add up.—Stephanie Weiss

DON'T worry about finding a bridesmaid's dress everyone will love. Remember that it's the bride's day.—Andrea Alcorn